James, Zagoden, and Winslow had set off only an hour ago. The road they were traveling swept around the desert arm and towards the northern forest. James felt confidence.

"Oh...so goblins don’t live in dark underground caves? I read that in some book series...what was it. Kanth...no....Santh...no....Zanth? I think that was it." James said into the morning air, making a cloud of breath float out.

"Well, where ever they live in Zanth, that’s not the case here. Here, they live in camps in the forests." Zagoden said, walking alongside Winslow.

James had noticed he wasn’t really walking, but floating.

"Oh. So what can you tell me about Pete?" James asked.

"Not much, really. He’s just like Peter." Zagoden exclaimed.

"So how does one go about taking over the universe?" James wondered.

"Simple, trading. You go trading things back and forth across dimensions for quite a high profit. Once you have enough money, you can buy an army. They are getting enough money to buy the biggest army." Zagoden replied.

"What do they do with the biggest army?" James said.

"Even simpler. They tell some one, ‘now we rule this dimension’. If any one objects, they blast them away. Now do you see?" Zagoden answered.

"Ahh...I see. How do you know so much?"

"I went up against many wanna-take-over-the-world freaks. In fact, last time I fought one was with a Pervian friend of mine. We took down some mad man named Isstvan. I heard he tried to take over the dimensions again about four years ago. My friend got an apprentice and, well, that’s another story." Zagoden replied. He looked all around nervously.

"Why so nervous?" James inquisited.

"...Lawyers..." Zagoden muttered.

"How’s that go again?" James asked.

"Oh, nothing. I was just wondering. So how do you feel about all this, Winslow?" Zagoden said, quickly changing the subject.

"But Winslow, he isn’t dead. His body was just destroyed." Zagoden said. Winslow did what was equivalent to raising an eyebrow.

"Simple, we cut a hole in James’s head that allows Joshua’s soul to escape." Zagoden said. Now James raised an eyebrow.

"Hey guys..."

"Good. When do we cut up James?" Winslow said.

"Hey guys..."

"Just as soon as we find another body suitable for Joshua." Zagoden said.

"Hey GUYS! If you don’t mind, I don’t want to have my head cut open! I like it the way it is." James said, now a little edgy.

"But it won’t be painful." Zagoden replied.

"But I DON’T want to have my head cut open!" James repeated.

"Don’t worry Zago, we’ll wait until he falls asleep." Winslow put in.

"Wait, hold, stop! I command you to not harm Joshua’s body!" James yelled out.

"Is that Joshua speaking?" Winslow asked.

"Uhh...uhh, yeah! Yes I am! I am Joshua Clairvoyant of Limburger!" James said, evidently bull shitting.

"You really didn’t think we’d believe you, do you?" Zagoden answered.

"Yeah, but it was worth a try." James replied sheepishly.

"Tell you what, James. We can settle this after we stop Peter. OK?" Zagoden snarled.

James looked at Winslow.

"All right. I guess so." Winslow muttered.

"Hey...what’s that?" Zagoden exclaimed. Evidently he saw something.

"What?" James said. He didn’t know what the wizard was pointing at.

"That!" Zagoden exclaimed. He pointed down the road.

It was a large caravan, some five hundred feet long. The wagons were on a direct course with their group, coming in from behind them.

"Gypsies!!!" the old wizard exclaimed, jumping up and down waving his arms.

The wagons were only a hundred feet away. It was plain that Zagoden intended to get their attention.

"I told you we should have stayed off the road, Zagoden. But NO! You go ahead without my advice." Winslow complained.

"And what kind of advice is that? Cutting open my head when I’m asleep? You don’t give good advice!" James retorted.

"Shut up! I just want my master back!" Winslow replied.

"I’m sorry...I know how you feel. Let’s just forget that whole ‘cut open his head’ incident." he replied "Now, why don’t you like gypsies?"

"Well...ok. It seems at best to forgive you, realizing we’re going to be stuck with each other for a while. I don’t like gypsies for one, because they are nothing but gypsies, tramps, and thieves. They are as trust worthy as far as I can throw them with my hooves." Winslow explained.

"But horses can’t throw people with their hooves. They would fall for lack of balance." James pointed out.

"Exactly my point." Winslow said, smiling.

It was three minutes before the gypsies arrived. The gypsy caravan stopped and a girl got out of the front wagon. James gaped. She wasn’t a gypsy, she was a hippie.

The girl had bell-bottoms on, and appeared to be at most twenty. She was topless. She wore a pair of sunglasses and held a walking stick.

"What’s the matter, ya think there’s no one else traveling this road? Yer blockin the road." she yelled.

"Ummm, mam, we were hoping to catch a ride." Zagoden said.

"Headed our way?" she asked.

"Yeah." James said. Obscene thoughts of the girl entered his mind.

She looked them over several times, then disappeared into the wagon. As soon as she had disappeared, she was back.

"Botluy says you can, but the old man stays on top with the driver."

"Oh, and the horse walks." she replied, disappearing back into the wagon again.

Winslow shot a dark glance at the wagon, then shrugged. James dismounted and joined Zagoden. Winslow trotted off to meet the horses pulling the lead carriage. Zagoden climbed up on top of the wagon, up next to the driver.

James climbed into the wagon door the girl had used.

Inside was just a big bed with fluffy pillows. The girl was setting by the door. A guy with no shirt and Levi’s was on the other side, by another door.

The guy had a bong. Him and the girl were passing it back and forth.

"Hello, handsome." the girl said, a half-eaten doughnut in one hand. She grabbed the bong, took a few puffs, and then ate the rest of the pastry.

James sat at the back of the wagon and rested. The girl looked him over, then passed the bong to him.

"No, no. I don’t smoke." James said, passing the bong to the guy.

"Ok. You ain’t gonna be pushed if that’s what ya want." the guy said, taking a few puffs and putting it in a cupboard above him.

"Umm, what’s your names?" James asked.

"I’m Polla Fenda." the girl said.

"Is that one or two names?"

"Yes." she answered.

"Uh, I’m Botluy Ku."

"Botleycoo. Is that first or last?" James asked.

"Yes."

James felt lost. He looked lost. He sat there until Polla spoke.

"Ok, James. Take off your clothes and we can start a threesome." she said.

"Ok, I...WHAT?" he answered, almost taking off his shirt.

He looked at Botluy and grimaced.

"Well ok, just you and me than." she said.

"Uhhh...what makes you think I want to get naked and start in some ‘love wrastlin’?" James asked.

"You don’t? I could swear that’s what I heard you thinking." she said, taking off her glasses and showing her ice blue eyes.

That had been what he had thought!

"How did you..." James said, just staring at her.

"Didn’t ya know, Polla is a Psychic." Botluy said.

"Yeah, and I distinctly heard you think ‘I’d like to fu-" she started to say.

"But, why go with my thoughts?" he asked, interrupting her.

"Well, you’ve heard the saying ‘gypsies, tramps and thieves’?" she replied.

"She’s a tramp." Botluy blurted out.

She looked at him, obviously offended.

"I prefer to be referred to as ‘monogamously-challenged’." she replied.

"So, you are basically saying, "you’ll sleep with any man". Right?" James asked. He had had many interactions with tramps in the past.

"Anyone." she replied.

"Anyone?" James asked, perplexed.

"Well... some of those girls are fun." Polla said, smiling.

"Like I say again and again, she’s a bisexual slut." Botluy said.

She turned and smacked him upside the head.

"So James," she said, turning to face him. "What brings you to our caravan? People normally stay out of our way."

"Can’t tell her your origins, act like me." Joshua’s voice said from the back of his mind.

"Ahh, I am Sir Joshua Clairborne. Second son of Lengaurd." he announced loudly. He felt more confident with those words.

"And what do you do?" Polla asked, interested.

"But what else, I'm a Bounty Hunter." he boasted.

"What have you hunted?" she asked.

"Ummm...umm..." he said, floating for thought.

"Carrion Crawler Queen and Granter the Red Dragon." Joshua thought.

"Umm, you might have heard of my great actions. I killed the Carrion Crawler Queen, and Grantar the Red Dragon. But that’s only a few." he answered.

"Ooh!" she oohed, crawling to him.

"Whaajjaa..." he started to ask.

After they were done kissing, they laid back and held each other. She pulled a switch, opening the roof. It was noon.

"It’s noon?" he asked.

"Of course. We think days are too long, so we have spells on the wagons to make time inside them speed up." she answered, unbuttoning his shirt.

"Why do you want this, really?" he asked, noticing her hands.

"You are handsome, and famous, and powerful. But I have this feeling that we’re destined." she said, opening his shirt and kissing his chest.

They undressed and slid under the pillows.

An hour later, Botluy opened the door. He shook his head. James and Polla were entangled in a mass of pillows.

"Hey whore, the party has started." he said. Then he closed the door.

Polla woke up. She put on a pair of shorts, then woke James up, telling him to get one on too.

They walked outside. There were tons of people around a great bonfire.

James spotted Zagoden. Winslow was next to him. James headed in that direction and Polla followed.

"Hey, James, you’ll never believe what kind of people they are." the old wizard remarked.

"You wouldn’t either." James responded.

"Shoot." Zagoden said.

"Well, for one, this is Polla Fenda." James said.

"Pleased to meet you." he said, kissing her hand.

"Is Polla Fenda one name or two?" Winslow asked.

"Yes."

James chuckled. Now Winslow was the lost one.

"And second?" Zagoden asked.

"Huh? Oh, yeah. The second weird thing is the reason we got on this caravan. When I saw Polla, some dirty thoughts crept into my mind." he replied.

Polla blushed, and held his hand.

"Naturally, she was a psychic and a tr....excuse me, ‘partner-exchangeable’ person. So she read my thoughts, and managed to get us on this train." James told Zagoden.

"Hmm. So you saved us a long walk by thinking with your third leg." he replied, then sipped from a goblet of beer.

"And yours?" James said. He grabbed a goblet from a nearby table.

"Yeah, I had thought with my third le-oh. My story. Well, the gypsies are heading to Piglington, North of Elfland." he said.

"What do they want there?" James asked.

"Well, politics on this continent are run by pigs." Zagoden replied.

"That’s the same as where I come from." James smiled.

"No, not people who act like pigs. Real, oinkity oinkity pigs." he informed.

"Umm...that in itself scares me." James remarked.

"Well, they were visiting the local kingdoms, to get votes, when their magician abandoned them. They were stranded in Dwarven country when we happened by." Polla started.

"Oh Yeah?" James pondered.

"They offered us money, so I got Botluy to agree to pick them up. We’ve been traveling ever since yesterday." Polla finished.

Zagoden got up. "Excuse me, but I should get into a discussion." he said. He walked over to a group of pigs.

"What’s your name?" Polla asked Winslow.

"Winslow. I only talk because of James’s magic pendent." he said.

"Ooh." she oohed.

James grabbed her, swung her around, and kissed her. Again they embraced.

He realized that they were a few feet from the forest edge.

James got up onto the saddle. Polla climbed up onto it, in front of him. Winslow knew what they wanted, and trotted into the forest.

They got off, and James told Winslow to go graze.

James and Polla sat and kissed. The moonlit sky provided the perfect mood for the situation.

All of a sudden, the whole encampment broke into a fight.

Polla, appalled, ran to check it out. James stayed in the trees.

Winslow trotted to him and pointed to his saddlebag. James grabbed a blue pendent. Winslow walked away.

James stood and listened. The pendent allowed him to hear every noise for a mile. There were Elves scampering around the forest, and the Gypsies arguing, but nothing else beyond an occasional rabbit or bird.

"What happened?" Polla asked. From what she could see, James’s wizard friend was the offender.

"That barbarian called me a worthless lunch meat!" one pig squealed.

"And he called me a stupid pork snout!" another cried. Two boars were holding Zagoden.

"What did you say?" she asked him, grabbing his shoulders.

"I was talking about an electoral government of both Democrats and Republicans. They said that it would never work and called me a..." he said, trailing off. He was bruised all over.< /P>

"A what?" Polla asked.

"...a two bit Alchemist." he said, lowering his head.

"Then what happened?" she said, keeping the conversation continued.

"I called them..." he started. Zagoden looked over to see the pigs giving him cold stares, "...dirty swine. Then they attacked me."

Polla looked over at the pigs. They gave innocent looks, giving innocence a bad name.

"What should we do?" Botluy asked, joining the two.

"Hang him!" one yelled.

"Burn `em!" another said.

"Torture `em!" a third cried.

"Castrate him!" put in a forth. Everyone looked at him. "What?"

Polla looked around, then decided.

"The only fair solution..." she began. The pig’s eyes narrowed.

Polla looked at Botluy, who nodded in agreement.

"...is to have a trial." she concluded.

The pigs grouped and discussed it. A small piglet walked up to Polla. "We agree. The jury will be picked tomorrow. Until then, we will have to keep the prisoner." he said.

"No, we must keep him. But you can guard the wagon if you want." Botluy answered. The piglet went back to the group. The pigs muttered to themselves.

The piglet came back out.

"We agree." he said.

Botluy shook the piglet’s hoof and walked to his wagon. The boars carried Zagoden to Polla’s wagon.

Zagoden got inside, Polla did too.

After a few moments, Polla spoke.

"So Zagoden," she said, turning to face him, "what brought you to our caravan? People normally stay out of our way."

"Ahh, I am the great Wizard Zagodenitiere Mecarini Tru in de Lau," he answered, "...but everyone just calls me Zagoden."

"And what do you do?" Polla asked, interested.

"But what else, I'm a spell caster." he boasted.

"Where are you going?" she asked.

"Ummm...umm..." he said, floating for thought.

"Right now, I’m going to Dragon Mountain to visit Foihler." he answered.

"Ooh!" she oohed, crawling to him.

"Um, Iiii..." he started to ask.

She kissed him. It was a deep, passionate kiss. He also felt a probing tongue, so he kissed her back. He hadn’t had a girl do this in a long while. They embraced. James was right, she was a tramp.

"I prefer to be referred to as ‘partner-exchangeable’." she replied

"What?" he asked. Had she heard his thoughts?

"Remember, I’m a Psychic." Polla said.

"Oh, sorry. Now lets relax and wait for the trial."

They laid back and held each other.

"Why are the clouds speeding by?" he pondered.

"Of course. We think days are too long, so we have spells on the wagons to make time inside them speed up." she answered, unbuttoning his shirt.

"Do you just sleep with any guy that comes along?" he asked, noticing her hands.

"No." she said. Luckily, he didn’t detect her lie.

"Why me?" he asked.

"You are handsome, and famous, and powerful. But I have this feeling that we’re destined." she said, opening his shirt and kissing his chest.

They undressed and slid under the pillows.

Two hours later, Botluy opened the door. He shook his head. Zagoden and Polla were entangled in a mass of pillows.

"Hey slut, the trial is about to start." he said. Then he closed the door.

They woke up. Zagoden put on his clothes, Polla put on a T-shirt.

They opened the door and stepped out. Two boars grabbed Zagoden.

Zagoden was led to the table by the boars. Polla followed.

He looked over and noticed that the audience was all pigs.

"Oh crap." Polla and Zagoden both remarked.

"What happened to all the people?" Zagoden asked.

"Food poisoning." a boar next to them barked.

"Probably intentionally..." Polla whispered.

"Silence!" a big boar yelled. He was standing by the judge’s stand.

A dragon, about 30 feet long, walked to the judge’s stand.

"All stand for judge Fistibreath." the boar bellowed.

Everyone stood.

"Now sssit." Fistibreath spoke. Everyone set down except the boars.

"The court issss now in sessssssion." the dragon said. The dragon was a smart and logical creature. "The participentssss will take their placssessss."

"Defendant." the dragon asked. Zagoden stood. He stepped forward.

"Zagodenitiere Mecarini." he said. He sat back down.

"Counssssal for the defensssse." Fistibreath stated. He nodded to Polla.

"Oh..." she replied. "Do you mean me?"

"Unlesssss you wisssh for a pig, Zagoden." he answered.

Polla quickly stood. "Polla Fenda." she said. She sat back down.

"Counssssal for thee prosecution?" Fistibreath asked.

An ork setting at a table a few feet from theirs stood up.

"Orkalona." he said. He quickly sat down.

"Memberssss of the jury, introduce yoursssselvessss and sstand for challengessss." the dragon asked. The juror box had 12 seats. The jurors walked out from behind the wagons. They entered the box and sat down.

The first one was an elf. "Kenny Kaidall." the elf said. Polla walked to the juror box.

"And what do you know about the incident, Mr. Kaidall?" Polla asked.

"Well, I was just...Mr.? You called me mister? Wow, that’s nice. Anyways, I was just doing my patrol of the southern-west forest edge, when I saw the incident. I came closer and watched the whole thing." he said.

"Then that means you could be called on as a witness?" Polla asked.

"Correct." the judge said.

"Objection!" Orkalona interrupted.

"On what account?" the dragon asked.

"Hum? Oh, just testing." the ork replied, chuckling.

"I prefer that the prosssecution refrain from ‘tessting’, or elsssse I will hold him in contempt of court." Fistibreath hissed

"What does that mean?" Orkalona asked.

"It meanss I haven’t had lunch yet. You can figure that one out." he answered. He did figure it out, and frowned.

If Polla challenged these people, they’d come up with some one worse. She promised herself to not challenge any of them.

"No challenge." Polla said. Orkalona just nodded no.

The second juror was an imp. He stood only three feet tall, and had goblin features.

"Imp Orium." he said. Polla turned to him.

"And what do you know about this trial?" Polla asked.

"Guilty!" the imp yelled.

"Excuse me, we haven’t had the trail. Why do you say guilty?" Polla asked.

"Well, booger head, I was tunneling along. Minding my own business, when I hear this arguing. So I surfaced to look, and was grabbed. The way I see it, I just say guilty and get it over with. Then I can get home." he replied.

Oh great. They just had to pick these kinds of people. "No challenge." Polla sighed. Orkalona smiled and replied "No challenge."

The third juror was the lead wagon driver. "Hart James." he said.

"No challenge." Polla replied. The ork did the same.

The forth juror was Botluy! "Botluy Ku." he said.

"No challenge." Polla replied. The ork did the same, but stopped smiling.

The fifth juror was a tree.

‘Your honor, what madness is this?" Orkalona asked, standing.

"I hand picked the jurors lasst night, now shut up!" the judge answered.

The prosecutor sat down.

"Tranto Tree" a voice said.

"Huh?" Polla asked.

"I am a Treant. I was resting by the forest edge when I heard the incident." the voice continued, coming from the tree’s branches.

"Uhh...no challenge." Polla said, shaking her head. Orkalona replied no also. Where did they find these people?

The sixth juror was a blob like thing. "Shipper H." it gurgled.

"And what do you know about this trial?" Polla questioned.

"Weelll...my brother was murdered by the wizard’s friend." it gurgled and squished. Then it made a smile.

"Uhhh...no challenge." she said, remembering her promise. Orkalona just smiled.

The last six jurors were pigs.

"Grabby Pig." the first pig oinked.

"No challenge." Polla said. Orkalona copied her answer.

"Rude Pigg." the second pig oinked.

"No challenge." Polla said. Orkalona copied her answer.

"Ob Noxious." the third pig oinked.

"No challenge." Polla said. Orkalona copied her answer.

"Porksnout Pig." the fourth pig oinked.

"No challenge." Polla said. Orkalona raised an eyebrow, then nodded.

The last two were identical.

"Lier Pig and Shiester Pig." they said at the same time.

"No challenge." Polla said. Orkalona nodded.

"No challengesss? Now that that is finissshed, may we proceed?" the dragon questioned.

The boar next to him brought up a scroll. "The defendant is charged with insulting a pig, intention to cause bodily harm, and conspiracy against the Piglington government. How do you plead?" he boasted.

Polla stood to speak, when Zagoden grabbed her by the shoulder. He spoke into her ear.

"My client, the defendant, wishes to plead one third guilty." Polla said.

"One third guilty? Define the one." Fistibreath replied.

Zagoden spoke into her ear again.

"My client says that "I did insult the stupid fat heads, and will continue to do so. The reason for this is two. First, speech is the only free thing in this world. Second; pork shouldn’t be running the government, it should be on a plate with a side of mashed potatoes. Oh, and innocent on the other two charges. " Polla stated. She sat back down.

Gasps ran wild through the jury and audience. The pigs muttered to themselves. Polla looked at Zagoden. "Nice. You could have just claimed guilty and gotten off with only a little prison time."

"Prosssecution?" the judge inquired.

"We intend to prove that the defendant is a threat to the pig government." Orkalona said, smiling at Polla.

"Make your cassse." the dragon said, setting back and yawning.

"The prosecution calls as it’s first witness, Grunt Pig." the ork said, giving a huge smile to Polla.

"May I remind the witnessss that the witnessss box he is in issss lie protected?" the judge said.

"Yes." Grunt said.

"What happened in the claimed event of last night?" Orkalona asked.

"Well, I was drinking my beer, when all of a sudden, the defendant smacked into me." he snorted, pointing to Zagoden.

"Uh Huh..." Orkalona said, smiling. "And why did he do it?"

"He was planning to kill me and all the other politicians...he was going to run for government, and we were in the way!" Grunt oinked.

Suddenly he wretched in pain. Fistibreath smiled, scaring the audience.

"May I again remind the witnesssss that the witness box issssssss lie protected?"

Grunt nodded, and the pain stopped.

"For thosssse of you unfamiliar with a lie protected witnessss box, let me explain. When a sssentance containing a lie is sssspoken, the witness reelssss in pain." the dragon explained.

Everyone kept quite.

"Um...I have no idea why he bumped into me." Grunt replied, hanging his head. The pigs in the jury narrowed their eyes and frowned.

"Fine, your witness." the ork said, sneering.

"Do you see a difference between humans and pigs, other than anatomy?" Polla questioned the witness.

"No, I’ve always believed that humans and pigs have the same rights. They are, in my mind, equals." he said. He knew that would get him more votes from the human lovers.

"Ok. So Grunt, do you vote?" Polla asked.

"Yeah, so. Why?" he oinked.

"Do you listen to the two parties, and then realize they call each other names. ‘Ones a cheapskate, the other likes welfare’?" Polla questioned.

"Yeah. All voting groups do that." he answered.

"In your own opinion; If you were arrested for speaking out against something the government did that you don’t believe in, would that be right?" Polla asked.

"No. I have the right to say anything against an unfair government!" he boasted.

"Ok. So we’ve already agreed that humans and pigs have equal rights. And we’ve already agreed that you should be able to speak freely." Polla asked.

The pig nodded. Orkalona, an idiot, couldn’t see where this was heading.

"So logically...Zagoden should be able to speak out against a government he doesn’t believe in." Polla replied, smiling.

"Yeah, of cou...hey!" Grunt said, doing a retake and realizing what she had just done. He grimaced. Orkalona did too. The pigs in the jury growled.

"That will be all." Polla said, satisfied.

"Next witness for the prosecution, Mayor Oik Pig." Orkalona said, sweating.

"May I remind the witnessss that the witnessss box he is in issss lie protected?" the judge asked.

"Yes, your honor." Oik replied.

"Were you infact the one Zagoden insulted?" the ork asked.

"Correct." the pig replied.

"What did he call you?" Orkalona questioned.

"He called me, Hardly Pig, Snobly Pig, and Frunt Pig ‘dirty swine’. Hardly and Snobly attacked him. I stood stunned." he oinked.

"And what do you think is the appropriate answer for this action?" the prosecutor asked. He smiled.

"Nothing. I think that Hardly and Snobly are the ones to blame. They reacted in the completely wrong attitude." he said, rubbing his goatee.

Orklano stood appalled, his mouth gaping. "Uhhh..." was all he could say. The ork had lost his smile.

"Yes, we should have waited to deal with him at nighttime." Oik replied.

He shook his head. "What about the other things?" Orkalona asked.

"Oh, yeah. He’s guilty of all the other charges." he oinked.

The ork found his smile. "Your witness."

"So you agree that he had a right to say what he said?" Polla asked.

"Well...technically. Morally, though, he’ll burn in hell." Oik oinked.

"That’s all." Polla sighed. She sat down and hid her face in her hands.

"The prosecution calls its next witness, Zagoden." Orkalona said.

Zagoden got in the witness box.

"Mr. Zagoden, what do you claim happened last night?" the ork asked.

"Well, I was discussing politics last night, a field I haven’t talked about in over a hundred years. I was of course appalled to find how it had changed in all that time." Zagoden started.

"Uh Huh..." Orkalona said sarcastically, obviously not paying attention.

"We had all been drinking, and alcohol affects your system. So I said a few things."

"For that I apologize, but all of the rest is nothing but bullshit." he finished.

"Yeah, so you say." the ork sighed. "Your witnesss."

"Ahhhh...am I correct when I say that you were only with us until you got to your destination? Am I not also correct in saying that you are not the one who started it, but infact you were a victim?" Polla asked.

"Well...I..." he started to reply.

"No. It wasn’t you. It was infact them!" she yelled pointing to Oik.

"Now see here..." Oik started.

"You proposed an order of government that stands against everything they are striving for! They realized that if you had gone public with it, it would not only bring you into power, but also bring down an empire that has tyrannized the land for centuries? They decided to get rid of you by setting up this whole trial!!!" she finished, huffing and puffing.

"Objection, your honor! Not only is she badgering the witness, but she’s running completely on hearsay which is irreverent to the case!" Orkalona protested. He was red hot.

"Prossssecution is right, your point issss-" Fistibreath started.

"ITS TRUE!!!!"

Everyone looked at Hardly Pig.

"ITS TRUE, ALL OF IT!!!!" he blurted out.

"WHAT!?!?!?!" all the pigs oinked in union.

"Oik thought the wizard was going to bring down pig rule!" he snorted, crying.

Mutters ran through the audience and jury.

"The defense rests." Polla said.

"Prossssecution?" the judge asked.

Orkalona had a crossbow to his head. "Huh? Oh. No more witness’s." He lowered the crossbow.

The jury muttered to themselves some more.

"Ssssummationsss?" Fistibreath asked.

"I wish only to say that legally I had no part in this case." Orkalona sighed.

"And you?" the dragon asked, looking to Polla.

"All that can be said, has been said." she replied.

Fistibreath turned to face the court as a whole.

"People of the court, the evidencssse is now handed over to the jury. They will now decssside a verdict." he said.

The members of the jury talked among themselves for a few minutes.

"Have you reached a decssssision?" Fistibreath asked.

"Yes, your honor." Kenny answered.

"Let’sssss have it." the dragon stated.

"Well..." he said, looking at the pigs. They were giving him glares.

"Out with it!" Fistibreath demanded.

"We of the jury find the defendant...innocent." he said, gulping.

"Well, I’m done here. I have an appointment in Gorbage." Fistibreath said.

"Is Foihler the dragon at home? We're on a journey to visit him." Zagoden asked.

"Hmmm...Yessss." the dragon answered.

"Why." the dragon asked.

"We need to speak to him." Zagoden replied.

"Sssssafe journey." he told the wizard.

The dragon took off into the air.

Zagoden and Polla turned to see Botluy.

"Not a bad trial for a cheap slut." he remarked.

Suddenly a club smacked him over the head. He fell to his knees.

A boar stood above him.

Suddenly Polla felt wood against the back of her head. The world went black.

She awoke under a tree. All the pigs were there. She realized a noose around her neck. Zagoden was next to her. Their hands were tied to each other.

"What is this? We won the case!" Polla asked.

"We can’t let him live, he knows too much." Oik said from behind them.

"But I won’t tell!" Zagoden protested.

"We can’t take that chance." Oik squealed.

"But I won’t tell, I don’t know!" Polla yelled.

"We know, you’re just a stupid slut." Oik replied.

"Then why do you want to kill me?" she asked.

"You’re the one who let this wizard join the caravan!" Oik pointed out.

"No more yappin, pull the rope." the audience yelled.

Polla felt the noose tighten, the air cut off from her throat.

She hung, choking.

Suddenly the rope was cut. Polla fell.

"Who, wha..." Oik gasped, his sentence cut off as his head was.

James stood above the dead pork, wielding his huge sword.

The pigs ran in terror.

"I am Joshua, lord of destruction! Die unclean swine!" he cried out, swinging the blade around his head. He enjoyed the power that came with wielding a blade as finely crafted as his.

In seconds all of the pigs had fled.

"Let’s get the hell out of here before they realize they out number us." he replied, grabbing Polla by the arm.